To keep you safe
by FiftyShadesOfJess
Summary: "You may kiss the bride" I want to throw something through the screen to make the picture disappear as Sawyer takes Ana – my lovely, beautiful Ana – in his arms and kisses her as the crowd assembled in the church applauds. Even though I was the one pushing for this wedding – to make it all seem real – it still feels like a knife piercing through my heart as Ana's lips meets his.


**Read this first:**

You know how sometimes when you get a great idea and you just have to write it down and you tell yourself you're not going to post it until the other stories you have in the workings are done…  
But then you start to worry – what if someone else comes up with the exact same idea, before I have a chance to finish my other stories and post this one! (I know…it probably won't be exactly the same anyways, but still…there's that worry)

I don't want to have three on-going stories at the same time, because then there would be too long between updates – but I wanted to post this anyway. **But I won't start updating this story until I've finished at least one of my other stories.**  
**Consider this a trailer, for something that's coming to a FanFiction-site near you soon…or something like that**…And of course: I would love to know what you think of the idea!

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**To keep you safe – Chapter 1**

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"You may kiss the bride" I want to throw something through the screen to make the picture disappear when Sawyer takes Ana – my lovely, beautiful Ana – in his arms and kisses her as the crowd assembled in the church applauds.

My hands balls into fists at my side as I stand unable to tear my eyes off the screen. Even though I was the one pushing for this wedding – to make it all seem real – it still feels like a knife piercing through my heart as Ana's lips meets his.

She isn't supposed to be kissing any other man besides me. Ever!

A chill runs through my body. What if Ana likes the feeling of his lips against hers? What if she likes them more than mine. Sawyer's arm circles her waist and I want to kill him with my bare hands for being so close to Ana. MY Ana.

It feels like an eternity passes by before the newly-wed couple parts and turns towards the crowd, smiling. _Why the fuck are they smiling?_

Because I told them so. I take a deep breath. They are smiling because I've spent hours upon hours explaining to them both how important it is that this thing comes off as the real deal. Another deep breath. _But it looks so fucking easy for them to smile!_ I couldn't plaster a smile on my face right now even if my life depended on it.

My hands are itching, grasping into thin air, looking for something – anything – to destroy. _I wish I could destroy that shit-eating grin on Sawyer's face!_ Luckily, Gail had anticipated this reaction and removed anything breakable from the living room the second I demanded to see the video from the wedding.

Slowly, they start walking down the aisle and as the wedding party follows, the camera zooms in on her father wiping a tear out of the corner of his eye.

I would like to think that tear is for me, for the happiness I and his daughter once had. But I know it's not. In his eyes, I'm the bastard that abandoned both my children and refused any further contact with them because my wife fell in love with another man. Seeing how he's taken care of Ana, even though she isn't his flesh and blood, after his divorce from her mother – I can see where he's coming from.

Even though I've gone to great lengths to convince everyone around me that that is the case – that if I can't have Ana I don't want them either – I wish that someone would stand up and see through the charade, say that there's no way they could ever believe I would do that.

Elliot tried. Oh, he tried. For weeks and weeks on end he kept pestering me, telling me that I was making the biggest mistake of my life giving my children up only because their mother broke my heart. Mia was even worse. She's still not speaking to me, saying she doesn't want to hear another word from me unless I decide to come to my senses.

My mother has resigned into being disappointed in me. That's the word she used. Disappointed. It hurts a million times worse than anger and I can no longer look her in the eyes. Not that I see her that often, I've buried myself in work for reasons none of them can ever know. Except Ana of course, I had to let her in on the whole story – there's no way she would have gone along with all of this if I hadn't. Her, Sawyer and Taylor are the only one who knows what's really going on. Gail is on a need-to-know basis, I don't know what Taylor had to tell her to convince her to stay at my services and I really don't care. I know she can keep her mouth shut.

But still. They were angry, they were hurt and they were disappointed, there was shouting and screaming and tears – but not once did anyone question the motive behind it. Not once did anyone stop to say 'Hey, something's going on here – Christian would never abandon his children. He loves them too much'. Not once.

On some level, I guess that's a good thing. I should take honor in the fact that we planned this entire thing so well that no one suspects there's anything other than the obvious going on. The obvious being Ana falling head over heels in love with the security guard I hired to keep her safe and me disowning both her and our children because of it.

The seemingly happy couple is now posing outside the church for photographs. _She's so beautiful_. So fucking beautiful.

My heart clenches and the tears I've fought so hard to keep back are forming a lump in my throat as my sweet little baby boy breaks away from his grandmother's hold and rushes towards his mother. He's so handsome in his little suit. _I hope he's too young for this to leave any lasting scars on his soul._

Ana bends down to his level and catches him in her arms as he comes tumbling against her. She hugs him tight and my heart takes a leap as the camera zooms in and I see tears in her eyes. Unlike all the other times I've seen tears in Ana's eyes, they seem to calm me down. This _is_ hard on her, pretending to be in love with another man.

Hopefully, her tears will pass on as happy tears to anyone else who might watch this video.

They've done a great job with finding a dress for her. The little bump that everyone will assume is the reason for their hasty wedding is hardly showing. I don't think it's even visible unless you actually know it's supposed to be there. _My little son or daughter…_ I hope this ordeal will be over in time so _I_ will be the one on the receiving end as the doctor will hand the baby over to his or her father's arms.

The video comes to a stop and I sink down into the couch, letting my tears fall freely. _How did life become this fucked up?_

For the past couple of months, I've been receiving threats. Letters threatening to destroy me; to take away everything I love. When the letters started having pictures of my family taken at a close range attached to them, I decided it was time to take action.

In order to keep my family safe – I had to take them out of the picture. I had to ensure whoever is sending me those threats that a live Ana living a happy family life with another man is tearing me apart even more so than the death of her and my children would ever do. And it does. Even though I know it's all a ruse to keep my family safe, it tears me apart.

The story we want our pursuer to believe is that I've been so occupied trying to figure out who's is sending those threats that I neglected my family and pushed Ana into Sawyer's arms – and since I increased her security due to the threats, those arms were never far away.

I trust Sawyer. I really do. I would never have involved him in my plan to keep Ana and my children safe if I didn't. He's smart and well-trained in what he does. I have to trust that he is able to keep my family out of harm's way until everything can go back to normal. He is a professional and this is just another assignment to him. I know that.

But I also know from experience how easy it is to fall in love with the amazing woman that is now posing as his wife. _I_ didn't even know what hit me until it was too late.

The only thing I live for right now is finding out who is sending me those threats and why so I can get my beautiful family back.


End file.
